i try but sometimes i just wont

Okay so heres the deal, now i dont normally do this cos i dont feel its right but right now being right doesnt blooody matter to me. Im a roman catholic and my mom has always taught me to be patient. i have gone through things i never imagined i would and it has made me a better person. i've learned to be more patient and humble.

There's one big problem to that.Human beings and their lack of ethics.
Im seventeen years old and if you were to ask me'' what made you today?'' i'd say THREE THINGS.

1. God
2.My family
3. My bestfriend's family

All three have been a huge influence in my life.

College.
I missed a year of high school and sometimes feel like i'd give anything to be back there.
Stepping in i met new people. i had a tough time fitting in. where i go to now majority of them are still in their narrow minds. Coming from having experiences and exposure somehow made me the 'OUTGIRL' here.To them i spoke funny and somehow my views on Shakespeares' writings were 'unheard words'. Fighting that and studies i juggled them. After almost a year i met the most amaizng friend in college and wondered where was she before?!

Anyhow back to the main point here. There's this girl, who has a very different character one which is somehow annoying to others. When i knew her I understood why but as a Catholic I decided to be patient with her.

We both share the same love for something and thats Music.We are both passionate about it. The only difference is I dont go around dissing people when my passion for it sometimes doesnt work out!!!

Yes this year has been a good year in terms of my singing opportunities. I will not mention them as they are personal information but its been a good year. This girl got to know about some things and started crying and getting mad at me for achieving something. That's not the worst part, implying that i dont deserve it?!

ALL OF US IN THIS WORLD , WE ALL HAVE A PASSION!
No ones' passion is greater than the other its just different! who the hell do you think you are implying to me that i dont deserve what i have achieved!

Prom Night
Word got around that i perform and i was asked to perform for the night. I refused but they insisted and so i accepted.She proposed an idea and wanted to perform with me and i though okay great sounds like a good idea. We can both come up with our ideas and fuse them. The theme for our night is 'Spanish' and she wanted to do a french song?

okay fine i said sure it wont be a problem. The song choice had to be hers and so i had good listen to it at home. I take any performance of mine seriously no matter the crowd or place.
Evert song i choose, every vocal technique plays an important role in my deicison. She asked for my opinion about the french song she chose and i said its nice but the vocals are too simple for me.
I like to perform when there's a fire in it, a spark something that makes me addicted. She took it the wrong way and was coming back to me with a funny attitude and being all sacarstic. I for one do NOT take that kind of attitude no matter who you are. If you were my friend I'd tell you but I dont hold a passion of loathe against you.

Course, i fired her comeback and said look im just telling you this so you dont say this to others. im patient and im telling you this but if you were to do it to someone else you're gonna piss them off. she laughed and said thank you. OKAY FINE RIGHT?

Next day i get in for law and Kim tells me shes been going around tellin people i yelled at her. BULLOCKS!
it was on freaking msn! how in bullocks name am i to yell at her? whatever i thought, i got no time for this crap.

today i read some shit on her blog.


listen up sweety, im loving and when i love someone no matter the hurt they cause i'll still love them. They respect me and they have values in them
You go around preaching about the lack of love and respect around us but go on dissing personal shit on the net? every thing in it disses everyone and how you didnt get what you wanted!!

Nobody gets what they want all the time!!!! you work to get there! you think everyones life is easy, you think that cos they dont talk about it. So dont you dare go on implying that im not good enough that i got chosen because of how i looked or whatever. No, he's never heard me sing and yes he requested that i perform but who are you to say i aint good enough or no better than you?

you see you dont just wherever you want to get with talent. its your respect and attitude towards people. you need to learn that and maybe people will learn to like you more and give you a shot. Im not stupid, i dont need literal words to understand your message. you think i dont observe what happens around me but you watch out because it aint just me.

I may not give you a piece of my mind that'll hit you so hard one day but if you keep going on like this, someone else will.